MANY of us have some fantastic childhood memories and if you grew up in Belfast or any part of the North for that matter, chances are those memories may be tinted with tragedy.
West Belfast-born journalist and broadcaster Alix O’Neill has put pen to paper to bring us her memoir titled ‘The Troubles With Us’ which charts growing up in Andersonstown during the 80s and 90s with an unorthodox family and all of the preoccupations of a teenage girl at that time – from boys, booze to Boyzone.
Now living in the south of France, the former St Dominic’s pupil explained to the Andersonstown News that she never planned to write the book in Belfast but a two week visit to the city led to spending four months living with her parents as lockdown took hold and she couldn’t return to France.
“There are so many different narratives to the Troubles and there is space for all of them. I think in the past you only really hear of the tragedy and the suffering of the Troubles and I certainly don’t want to minimise that," she said.
"But I felt that there was space for the other side of Belfast – that dark sense of humour and the craic and the complexity and the otherness of Belfast. I wanted to show that there were lots of different stories to be told and I do have quite an unusual family story but I felt that my family was sufficiently bonkers enough that it would be a good way to tell that different side of Belfast.
“I have been living away from home since I was 18. First I was in Dublin then I was in London and I really was surprised about how little people knew about Northern Ireland. It was really bizarre, especially being in Dublin as we were only two hours up the road and they just had this image that we were running around in balaclavas all of the time and that was the only side of life and so I wanted to show the very normal side in many ways for a teenage girl growing up in the 90s.”
While Alix’s memoir is most certainly not a book about the Troubles, it is fair to say that it is firmly set during that time period as throughout the book her family story is anchored around key events in the conflict.
In the book we are introduced to Alix’s extended family and like most families, we learn of some estrangements and complex relationships.
Remarking on her family's opinion of the book, Alix says that she had the full backing of her parents and sister but she understands not everyone in her family is delighted that she decided to share the family history.
“I really thought long and hard before I did. I tried to make sure that I was telling it from my point of view because it is very much my mum's story as well. I didn’t speculate too much about other family members or what they thought about things and I make that clear in the book.
“My sister is getting married next year, so if they show up then I guess all has been forgiven.”
Throughout the book Alix’s mother Anne forms a central character with her eccentricities but also her success as chairperson of the Federation of the Retail Licensed Trade.
“She was known as the madwoman of Andytown which tells you all you need to know really,” Alix joked.
“She chased a couple of lads down the street with a hurl one day because one of them exposed themselves to us. She was a formidable woman but in many ways she represents the heart of Northern Ireland and it’s women. She’s not a woman to be messed with.”
Aside from Alix’s mother, we also learn that her dad directed the now infamous ‘Fred there’s no bread’ advert which graced the local TV during the '80s.
“After he directed the advert he was so delighted with himself that he bought a vintage Jag which did 12 miles to the gallon and that wasn’t really appreciated in Andytown as you can imagine so he traded it in for a Toyota,” she added.
Whilst reading The Troubles With Us we get a strong sense of Alix coming to terms with her identity as she discusses the first time that she truly felt Irish as she watched Riverdance on Eurovision to when she goes off to university in Dublin and starts to question if she is as Irish as her southern classmates.
“When I am away from Ireland I always say that I am Irish. I feel very comfortable in my Irish identity but I realise that when I am in Ireland, people from the south don’t see me as Irish in the same way. We don’t share the same cultural reference points, we grew up in very different ways.
“At first that really bothered me as I was like, who are you to tell me if I am Irish or I am not? When you grew up in the '90s as a Catholic from West Belfast that was everything – your Irishness and I think that I am part of a generation that both sides of the divide are very happy to be called Northern Irish but I think people are leaning into that new Northern Irish identity.”
The Troubles With Us also touches on issues which are currently impacting the North from the mental health crisis, LGBTQ+ issues, to female reproductive health, which Alix says she is delighted to see changing attitudes towards.
It is fair to say that Alix can be seen as a Brexile, having left London in the wake of the Brexit vote for a new life in France which she attributes to a sense of ignorance on the part of some that she encountered whilst living in England.
While Alix may have found a new life elsewhere, West Belfast remains close to her heart and when asked what she misses most about living there, she answers firmly: “Freddies Kitchen. Their Sweet and Sour Chicken Balls can’t be beaten.”
The Troubles With Us is published by 4th Estate and is available from all good bookstores.
