NEW Assembly Speaker Edwin Poots, when asked in his first interview in the job about TUV leader Jim Allister, said he’d like to “clean his clock” – an informal phrase meaning to punch someone in the face.
Squinter asked the Loyal Ulster correspondent of 'No Sunday Sports Illustrated' for his thoughts on this possible match-up.
This fight is one that has lovers of the sweet science drooling in anticipation. The only venues capable of coping with demand would be Hillsborough Cattle Mart or Kells Orange Hall. But with a range of gospel concerts coming up in the greater Lisburn area and the marching season in North Antrim, the organisers are going to have a narrow window. Bit like the Orange Halls have, come to think of it.
Jim would have to go up four stone in weight to make this contest, but if he concentrates on the tray bakes at all those anti-Jeffrey Donaldson rallies in the coming months I think he can do that easy. Edwin’s going to want to stand off his man and use his superior reach to pick Jim off, but don’t forget that the North Antrim fighter is no stranger to stand-offs himself.
Jim’s going to have to work hard to get inside, where he can do most damage, but the DUP aren’t going to let him do that as easy as they let him back inside Stormont. I expect Pootsy to push his opponent about the ring a fair bit and, believe me, Jim isn’t going to like that. But on the other hand Jim can score heavily leading with the right, as he does so effectively in his articles in the News Letter.
When it comes to knock-outs, realistically Jim doesn’t have the firepower to put Edwin on the floor which means he’ll have to wear him down, which he has done to opponents with huge effectiveness throughout his career, in and out of the ring. As we’ve seen in the past two years, stoppages are a DUP speciality and I would expect Edwin to stop Jim around about the Twelfth, and your readers can insert their own jokes here.